During my Psychology studies, I found the distinction between empathy and compassion to be a captivating topic. Although these terms are often used interchangeably, they have different meanings. Recognising the differences between the two can be beneficial in preventing burnout and exhaustion. Empathy and compassion, while similar and commonly used in the same context, are not synonymous.
Empathy involves understanding and sharing the emotions of another person, such as experiencing similar feelings when sharing their loss or grief. On the other hand, compassion goes beyond empathy by encompassing the desire to help and alleviate the pain and suffering, in addition to experiencing the emotions. Empathy entails deeply resonating with someone’s suffering, feeling their pain, and almost embarking on an emotional journey alongside them. This can apply to both positive and negative situations. It is a self-directed response to their heartache and is associated with empathic distress.
Compassion, in contrast, involves being aware of someone’s tragedy and having a genuine concern to alleviate their suffering. While it also involves feeling someone else’s pain, it is accompanied by the awareness and desire to take positive actions to help them through their situation. Compassion is characterised by an other-directed focus, where the emphasis is on being concerned for the person rather than being concerned with them. This approach centres on taking proactive steps towards healing instead of solely experiencing and sharing the suffering.
Empathy is closely tied to taking on and sharing the emotional experiences of another person, whereas compassion is directly linked to the act of alleviating suffering.
Based on a study regarding empathy and compassion, participants initially felt negative emotional states after a few days of empathy training. However, these negative emotions shifted to a more positive state after receiving compassion training. The study suggests that supporting others out of compassion is more effective and less likely to lead to burnout. Without the intention to inspire positive actions, compassion alone can result in empathic distress.
Empathic distress arises when individuals respond to someone else’s suffering with a focus on their own emotions rather than genuine concern for the other person. This occurs when individuals become too absorbed in sharing the emotional pain of others, neglecting to protect themselves and ultimately hindering their ability to effectively help others. Kelly McGonigal, a Stanford University lecturer and psychologist, explains that empathic distress is driven by the desire to alleviate one’s own discomfort, guilt, or negative feelings, rather than by the qualities associated with compassion. In her book “The Science of Compassion,” she warns that empathic distress can lead to pathological altruism, where the urge to assist others results in self-sacrifice.
The neuroscience model of compassion identifies three key components that actively engage the brain:
1. Social cognition: The processing, storage, and interpretation of observations and interactions with others in our environment.
2. Visceral/emotional empathy: The emotional connection felt with others as a result of their suffering.
3. Reward motivation: The innate sense of peace and satisfaction that comes from practicing compassion.
Kelly McGonigal emphasises the importance of having these three functions of the brain active and in harmony in order to truly feel compassion towards others. When there is a distortion in social cognition, like discriminatory behaviours based on social status, it can lead to subconscious biases and hinder authentic compassion. Furthermore, it is crucial to balance emotional empathy with reward motivation to take compassionate action. Continuously displaying emotional empathy without the presence of reward motivation can result in empathic distress. Discrepancies between emotional empathy and reward motivation can be noted in roles that entail assisting others, such as in conflict zones, where individuals like nurses are consistently aiding those in need, but their responsibilities shift to different areas before they feel any gratification of reward motivation, thus, putting them at risk of burnout.
Burnout occurs when individuals push themselves beyond their limits in pursuit of rewards, despite diminishing returns. Research suggests that individuals in helping roles need to experience a sense of reward satisfaction, known as the “warm inner glow,” to sustain compassionate actions.
In summary, through focusing on personal growth, striving to eliminate inequality, and valuing others as we value ourselves, we can cultivate sustainable compassion. This allows us to connect on an emotional level, experience intrinsic rewards, and ultimately, provide genuine help to others.
Takeaway Tip: Practicing mindfulness is a great tool that can help to remain in the present during experiences of suffering. It can help to feel for the sufferer while also being solution-driven, rather than becoming trapped in the suffering itself.
